Side note: I went through a time of avoiding making this space a “reality show”. Making this choice meant that I would to deny myself the pleasure of using my life’s journey, stories I’ve heard and things I know — my experiences to inspire me. But then how can you write otherwise? Yup, I know. It’s impossible. I was not wise. Now, I’ve forgiven myself for being foolish in this manner and it feels good. Just felt like letting you in… let’s read!
Life is a constant revelation of seasons. Unique to individuals, yet common to all. To make it more complex, these seasons come with transitions. There’s so much that is unclear in transition. See, I love understanding. Hence, I could not reconcile with the reality that conversations about “in-between” seasons are difficult to have.
Even though everything falls into place during transition, it is not simple to explain the details of that process. The level of vagueness during that time is a form of torment. While I was pondering this, I had an idea that a person’s existence can be said to be a transition between birth and death. You’re born unaware of what you are supposed to do with yourself until you’re taught this and that by other people who were once like you. Clueless.
We go through life trying to figure so many things out. Much learning takes places from the time we’re born until we die. Still, there’s a lot we don’t get to understand. Embracing this truth helps us live better. There will be grey areas, in-between seasons and countless transitions. Such experiences bring with them uncertainty. Heck, life is filled with uncertainty. You won’t always be able to explain your state of being. I grappled with this for a while, it felt as though I was living aimlessly because for a season in my life I couldn’t understand a thing about myself (and life itself). Little did I know that it’s okay not to know or understand sometimes. The beauty of life is also found in being lost and eventually finding your way.
Grey areas demand patience from us. Transition helps to accept that we don’t always have full control. The in-between exists for the purpose of building towards the desired outcome. It is not a permanent state and must not be allowed to be. However, it must be embraced when encountered in order to appreciate the end product of its process.
I’ve come to understand how uncomfortable it can be to converse about our grey areas. The fact that you can’t say anything with certainty makes you vulnerable in a way that you never get used to. The same way we aren’t sure how the rest of our lives will play out, since our existence in itself is a transition. Regardless of how careful we are in our decision making, the in-between is beyond our control. I’m sure each one of us can think back to a time when we did everything right but didn’t get our desired results. Or when you did nothing right but things still worked out. That’s what I’m talking about — bits and parts we can not explain that made a difference in our journeys.
None of us can escape the in-between, the grey area — transitions. All we can do is embrace them. Accept (maybe with a pinch of salt) that at times you won’t know whether you’re coming or going, but it’s not there to last. My prayer for you is that you take it easy with your transitions.